What a massive few weeks it’s been for me.
On all levels.
I’ll fill you in more on all the details in another post because I want to devote this one to an incredibly healing experience I had working with a man by the name of Ryan Heart.
I actually went there with the aim of ‘sussing’ him out a little to see if there was potentially some work we could do together as I’m feeling the need to align with some male energy to deliver events or programs that have a good balance of male and female energies.
I do sometimes get a bit concerned that with all the work women are currently undertaking and doing, that we may leave the men behind… and that the gap between the sexes will grow wider not closer. Hence contacting Ryan.
I can tell you, I was not expecting what transpired over the two and half days that I spent with him and the gorgeous Hunter valley.
As I drove along the winding road from Sydney, I had moments where I thought about turning around and cancelling, I mean I was heading into a mans house alone that I had never met to spend a few days understanding his work.
However, the feeling didn’t last long and my heart told me to keep going and that I was perfectly safe. Cool!
I also had a strange and unfounded idea that his ‘space’, his home that I would share for the next few days would be somewhat ‘grungy’ and I’d have to just ‘suck it up’. How wrong I was.
I arrived to a beautiful, clean (physically & energetically) space. Simple yet cosy, clean, comfortable and inviting. I breathed a massive sigh of relief as he saw the previous guest out and they said their heartfelt goodbyes.
I placed my belongings in my bedroom and we sat in front of the fire to chat, explaining what the next few days would look like.
After dinner we continued our chat, a chat that flowed easily and comfortably until we decided we needed to get enough sleep for the next days journeying. I slept a peaceful sleep that night!
Awaking to a beautiful morning, hugs from the gorgeous Bella (Ryan’s trusty companion) along with Ryan’s breakfast concoctions (super healthy and enlivening) we dressed and headed off for our adventure.
We first walked to a bend in the river where we paused to connect with her beauty and wisdom and then after much hesitation (on my part) and encouragement (on his part) I stripped down to my underwear and launched myself into the freezing cold winters river. Holy Hell!
She took my breath away completely!
I must have had a weird arse look on my face as I came to the surface unable to draw breath and with my body in complete shock. I swam quickly to the edge and couldn’t get out quickly enough.
But then, wow!
How revitalized I felt.
I stood there for a while allowing myself to dry off, not feeling cold at all.
So, why did we jump in?
In preparation for the mountain.
To cleanse away the ‘dirt’ and allow the magic of the mountain to really come through. Clearly and more powerfully. To hear her secrets and the guidance and healing she offers.
We stand at the base (now dressed and dry) and Ryan asks if there is a part of her that I feel may be calling me?
Yep! There, I point.
So off we head to climb the mountain. It’s a fun and adventurous climb, making our own track through the bush, over rocks, zigzagging as we head up.
We get to a point where I’m needing some help, my shorter legs unable to get me over the boulder in front.
Ryan extends his hand to offer help and for some reason I’m hesitant and then I hear a whisper ‘TRUST’.
Hmmmm, trust hey? I take his hand and he pulls me up over the boulder. As we get closer, he then jokes, ‘geez, you pick the hard way don’t you?’
Um, well, yes, normally. Kind of a theme in my life really, often joked about amongst close friends actually.
Okay, the mountain has my attention. She’s talking gently and subtly to me and I’m listening.
We get to the spot I pointed to (thanks to Ryan’s deep connection with this place, I’d have no idea) and before me is a beautiful rock cave.
‘Is this it?’ he asks.
He goes off to explore with Bella while I have some time to myself here. As I sit quietly soaking up her energy, allowing it to flow through me, I hear ‘TRUST’.
I’m here to heal my ‘issues’ with trust.
So I sit and allow it all to come through. Trust of myself and trust of men in particular. The healing is gentle. Here, on this mountain it integrates softly, without ‘work’ as such, just through awareness and acknowledgment.
It’s a peaceful and beautiful way to heal.
After a little while, Ryan joins me, through his intuition and connectedness, gently guides, asking questions, which helps to process what’s coming through.
We must have sat there for quite awhile before we head further up and along the mountain.
We get to a magical rock formation and we do a little exploring before Ryan spots the eagle.
An eagle he has a strong connection with, perching in a tree not too far away. We decide to see how close we can get to it. It allows us within perhaps 20 meters (okay, distance isn’t my thing, so I’m guessing here) before he spreads his wings and takes flight, soaring off the mountain in full view.
Wow! That was fricken amazing!
As we continue our hike, we stop at various spots to really soak in the beauty and energy of this place and continue our talks along the way.
We make it back after eight hours. Back to a warm fire, nourishing dinner, soothing teas and more discussion.
I go to bed happily exhausted and allowing the integration of healing to continue.
We have a late start on Sunday, both a little weary from the previous days adventure but knowing there’s a little more to do.
We hike to a local ancient cave, still bearing original aboriginal cave paintings on the walls, about 5 km’s away.
On our hike, I have a ‘moment’ with a horse that’s on our path, a lovely connection that fills my heart and leaves it open.
In the cave we meditate, side by side, Bella at our feet, patiently allowing and waiting.
We must have been there for a good hour or more and I have more awakening to aspects within me that are wanting to be acknowledged so they can be healed.
Wow, this is pretty profound stuff.
And it’s all happening so gently.
It’s not the big slap that the Universe has to sometimes deliver upon us, to get us to wake up and listen. This is gentle, deep, subtle yet profound.
Today is devoted to healing the imbalance of my masculine and feminine energy within.
What I haven’t mentioned yet is that ‘trust’ came up for me only a week prior at our One-day Retreat in Melbourne that Colleen and I ran and I pretty much ignored it, saying I’d look at it later when I get some time and then completely forgot about it. The mountain wasn’t going to let me get away with that one!
As for the balancing of the masculine and feminine? It’s been screaming at me but I didn’t really know how to ‘tackle’ that one.
Wasn’t sure where or how to start. I’ve been way too much in my masculine energy much of the time, for valid and various reasons, but unaware of how to rebalance and heal the divine masculine within me.
Even my Reiki Master has picked up on it and when we met for a coffee catch up after my SIX months living in Bali, placed a bottle of Sacred Divine Masculine essence on the table in front of me. Ha!
It did also come up at our retreat in Melbourne too.
All of this took place only a few weeks prior to spending time with Ryan and the mountain yet none of it was present in my mind when I arrived there in the Hunter Valley.
The mountain, with Ryan’s guidance brought awareness, clarity, a-ha moments and deeply profound healing. It consolidated the previous moments and integrated the healing, growth and learning’s. Gently and subtly.
It really wasn’t until a few days later when I looked back and truly understood what had transpired.
For that, I’ll be forever grateful to a man I can now call a friend, Ryan Heart and the truly unique and amazing work he does.
His own journey to here has not been an easy one; in fact, it’s been a bloody painful one! And it’s this that makes him truly inspiring.
There’s nothing you need to hide from him. There are no judgments, just a pure desire to help people realize their own truths. To help realise their own healing, connect with their heart and shine their light.
I’d really like to take this opportunity to thank Ryan from the depths of my soul for all that he does and all that he is.
Links are here if you feel inspired to check out his work either on his website or connect via FB.